I get accused of being too much of a "downer" from time to time, and I understand why. So here's a piece to try and lighten the mood, and at my expense.
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Your imagined Interpol is much too competent. They are an international version of Inspector Clouseau. As you discovered, being on their alert, or not on their alert list makes no difference whatsoever.
Sounds like you had an encounter with government bureaucracy.
That said, with that level of confusion, you COULD have ended up in jail, too.
I'm told they are just a repeater, alert comes in then sent out. Then sent to local courts to sort out extradition . Have to have agents in each locality to go to court to say: yes we issued the warrant, no I do not know why, that is up to the local juriadiction and remind the court that their country signed a treaty to honor the warrant.
But there is one branch that is very effective and widely feared: anti-cigarrette smuggling apparatus.
In late November 2022 my nighttime bus from Mostar to Split was held up at the border for a seriously long time. Based on what happened next, I'm guessing Croat authorities didn't like that the driver had skipped the final bus stop before the border, because we had to drive to some small village, go into a parking lot, then turn around and go right back to the border station.
Absurd situation all around. The bureaucrats seem almost too nice and helpful, however the bureaucratic procedures are complicated as expected(go to location A, then come back to B, then go to C), but once you get there, everything gets taken care off in minutes.
All I can imagine is that some clerk fat-fingered his input and instead of a "remind this guy about his speeding ticket if you see him" notice in the system you ended up with "WAR CRIMINAL ALERT" - would make sense as there was no arrest warrant or anything else attached.
I rarely travel outside Schengen, but at my last encounter with the German border police they became more and more pissed the more it became clear I wasn't carrying anything and they had just wasted everybody's time.
This border crossing doesn't see much traffic as it is mainly local. They've seen me plenty of times before, and they know that I'm from the other side of the mountain. Total gentlemen.
Agree but don’t you find this scary? Feels arbitrary and petty and the centralization of all this data is worrying. Bureaucratic hell. Now imagine this was something more important you needed or wanted? I find this story very troubling and makes me worried about what is coming in the near future with facial recognition, AI and the increased bureaucratic state with their concerns about terrorists/political dissidents.
Tsk tsk, Niccolo, a speeding ticket is the easiest infraction to avoid.
In my previous career I traveled a lot. I spent about ten years living out of a suitcase traveling the world, but mostly Europe, including Eastern Europe just after the Wall came down (I lived for a couple years in London and most of a year in Paris and Brussels, too). That was all a long time ago, and today I am often asked if I would like to travel again. The answer is always, "No," mostly because it's simpler, and also because I am improbably satisfied with my parochial existence here in Northern Nevada. There is no where else I would rather be.
But to be honest, there are a few places in the world I would like to visit at least once, including former Yugoslavia, owing primarily to a biography I once read of Marshall Tito. I gather as an American I would not be very welcome in Serbia, but I have heard that about a lot of places where I was in fact treated with warm hospitality.
Another place that would be interesting for me is Vietnam. And still another is, sadly, Russia, and I suspect the window for a visit there is closing.
The Serbs are very, very hospitable people and you would be welcome there so long as you don't crap on them.. If you make it out this way, lemme know and we'll meet up.
Russia is still open if you can organize a visa. Russians still friendly, the only shit that I got last time (4 weeks ago) was from an Asian guy from one of the Southern Republics who clearly had a chip on his shoulder about European looking guys like myself.
The number of times I’ve been stopped re-entering the US is actually retarded. It’s always nothing - glad your experience of being stopped was nothing too…
I had a work visa rejected in 2015 on a really bullshit paperwork technicality, and from 2015 until after covid, EVERY SINGLE TIME I crossed the US border, I got "randomly" selected for secondary screening.
"Yeah. I formatted a date wrong in my paperwork, they told me to fix it, I came back a week later with it fixed, they said it was fine". I know their computer says this, so why are they stopping me?
Holy shit, Nic, I have an unpaid Italian speeding ticket from the Emilia-Romagna region. I was caught on some camera and the car rental company forwarded the ticket/fine onto me by email. I tried to pay it online more than once but their fucking system is all in bureaucratic Italian gibberish. Eventually I just gave up. Should I be worried about the carabinieri grabbing me by the collar when next I try to enter Italia? Should I fly to Switzerland instead and cross the border by car???
At the risk of stating the obvious, this is beyond fucked.
First off: you can have your ID confiscated on the basis of a civil fine?
Second: International police agencies get red alerts for _speeding tickets_?
Honestly if I was in your shoes I probably would have grabbed the border guards gun and blown my brains out right in front of him. I'm not living in a world like that
Not to mention, doesn't really matter how apologetic he was. He could have just said he took your id, and not. At the end of the day, he gave you a sob story but he's still the iron fist of global authoritarians. Fuck that guy, he gets the rope
The irony is that if you were irate, they would have had "reason" to suspect you.
I've had similar encounters in this Kafkaesque world and despite being a fiery person, I naturally remained calm and nothing escalated.
I honestly don't get why people look to intimidate police... Even with the stupid mask mandates on public transport, I would put my mask on and apologize only to let it uncover my nose later.
Don't give the authoritarian system a reason to arrest you!
I get accused of being too much of a "downer" from time to time, and I understand why. So here's a piece to try and lighten the mood, and at my expense.
Hit the like button at the top or bottom of this page to like this entry. Use the share and/or re-stack buttons to share this across social media. Leave a comment if the mood strikes you to do so.
Your imagined Interpol is much too competent. They are an international version of Inspector Clouseau. As you discovered, being on their alert, or not on their alert list makes no difference whatsoever.
Sounds like you had an encounter with government bureaucracy.
That said, with that level of confusion, you COULD have ended up in jail, too.
Glad you evaded the dragnet!
Think positive!
The guys at the border were absolute gentlemen...which put my mind at ease.
And hey, free meal on one of them
I am going to take him up on it, and will pay the bill myself to thank him.
That's a lovely thing to do.
What would their Canadian or American peers have been like?
My brother in kaw retired from US Marshalls and was going to join Interpol.
Then he remembered what a nightmare it was to deal with them and noped out
I've done quite a bit of work internationally in security/diplomacy/intel and related fields.
Interpol is a non-entity. Not sure what they even do. Must be like an administrative processor role, or something.
I'm told they are just a repeater, alert comes in then sent out. Then sent to local courts to sort out extradition . Have to have agents in each locality to go to court to say: yes we issued the warrant, no I do not know why, that is up to the local juriadiction and remind the court that their country signed a treaty to honor the warrant.
But there is one branch that is very effective and widely feared: anti-cigarrette smuggling apparatus.
The band has more complex logistics.
In late November 2022 my nighttime bus from Mostar to Split was held up at the border for a seriously long time. Based on what happened next, I'm guessing Croat authorities didn't like that the driver had skipped the final bus stop before the border, because we had to drive to some small village, go into a parking lot, then turn around and go right back to the border station.
"Protocols are protocols."
I was expecting the Globalists have put a ransom on your head for your anti-Imperialist sentiment. I guess not this time. :)
The thought did cross my mind!
Badge of honor
Absurd situation all around. The bureaucrats seem almost too nice and helpful, however the bureaucratic procedures are complicated as expected(go to location A, then come back to B, then go to C), but once you get there, everything gets taken care off in minutes.
Sorry, I can beat this for stupidity by at least 600 miles.
To get a Covid swab.
Then turn round.
All I can imagine is that some clerk fat-fingered his input and instead of a "remind this guy about his speeding ticket if you see him" notice in the system you ended up with "WAR CRIMINAL ALERT" - would make sense as there was no arrest warrant or anything else attached.
Occam's Razor suggests that this is what happened.
Also, how nice were those border guards?
I rarely travel outside Schengen, but at my last encounter with the German border police they became more and more pissed the more it became clear I wasn't carrying anything and they had just wasted everybody's time.
This border crossing doesn't see much traffic as it is mainly local. They've seen me plenty of times before, and they know that I'm from the other side of the mountain. Total gentlemen.
Always nice to see another dramatard in the wild.
Agree but don’t you find this scary? Feels arbitrary and petty and the centralization of all this data is worrying. Bureaucratic hell. Now imagine this was something more important you needed or wanted? I find this story very troubling and makes me worried about what is coming in the near future with facial recognition, AI and the increased bureaucratic state with their concerns about terrorists/political dissidents.
Maybe I’m just paranoid. 😊
I've come to accept that privacy is now history.
Defeatist attitude. Understandable though.
The fat finger was a software upgrade done by a semi starved south Asian.
You seem to be thinking ADP or data entry… those days have passed.
It is still surprising a speeding ticket was important enough to justify Interpol alert + how did the system know it was you who was speeding.
Rental car under my name
Wow- almost becoming a non-person due to a speeding ticket!
I made a similar jokey comment while I applied for my new ID card
One too many speeding tickets and you might risk an extraordinary rendition.
Too true.
Tsk tsk, Niccolo, a speeding ticket is the easiest infraction to avoid.
In my previous career I traveled a lot. I spent about ten years living out of a suitcase traveling the world, but mostly Europe, including Eastern Europe just after the Wall came down (I lived for a couple years in London and most of a year in Paris and Brussels, too). That was all a long time ago, and today I am often asked if I would like to travel again. The answer is always, "No," mostly because it's simpler, and also because I am improbably satisfied with my parochial existence here in Northern Nevada. There is no where else I would rather be.
But to be honest, there are a few places in the world I would like to visit at least once, including former Yugoslavia, owing primarily to a biography I once read of Marshall Tito. I gather as an American I would not be very welcome in Serbia, but I have heard that about a lot of places where I was in fact treated with warm hospitality.
Another place that would be interesting for me is Vietnam. And still another is, sadly, Russia, and I suspect the window for a visit there is closing.
Basically, I like being among tough people.
The Serbs are very, very hospitable people and you would be welcome there so long as you don't crap on them.. If you make it out this way, lemme know and we'll meet up.
Go via Istanbul and you shouldn't have any problems.
Russia is still open if you can organize a visa. Russians still friendly, the only shit that I got last time (4 weeks ago) was from an Asian guy from one of the Southern Republics who clearly had a chip on his shoulder about European looking guys like myself.
That guy had issues. Surely most Russians are European-looking.
In Moscow definitely.
I was speaking bad Russian so he asked me where I was from. But he was far from friendly.
The number of times I’ve been stopped re-entering the US is actually retarded. It’s always nothing - glad your experience of being stopped was nothing too…
I had a work visa rejected in 2015 on a really bullshit paperwork technicality, and from 2015 until after covid, EVERY SINGLE TIME I crossed the US border, I got "randomly" selected for secondary screening.
"Yeah. I formatted a date wrong in my paperwork, they told me to fix it, I came back a week later with it fixed, they said it was fine". I know their computer says this, so why are they stopping me?
Holy shit, Nic, I have an unpaid Italian speeding ticket from the Emilia-Romagna region. I was caught on some camera and the car rental company forwarded the ticket/fine onto me by email. I tried to pay it online more than once but their fucking system is all in bureaucratic Italian gibberish. Eventually I just gave up. Should I be worried about the carabinieri grabbing me by the collar when next I try to enter Italia? Should I fly to Switzerland instead and cross the border by car???
Hahaha, I don't know bro.
You’re not the only one who has one of those and the same issue paying it. But mine is from 13 years ago so hopefully disappeared by now.
Clearly, you have the patience of Job.
I really don't, but my options were very limited.
Wait till they learn you've talked to the RWA guys recently.
At the risk of stating the obvious, this is beyond fucked.
First off: you can have your ID confiscated on the basis of a civil fine?
Second: International police agencies get red alerts for _speeding tickets_?
Honestly if I was in your shoes I probably would have grabbed the border guards gun and blown my brains out right in front of him. I'm not living in a world like that
Not to mention, doesn't really matter how apologetic he was. He could have just said he took your id, and not. At the end of the day, he gave you a sob story but he's still the iron fist of global authoritarians. Fuck that guy, he gets the rope
Oh? My dear Eidein.
He is the hangman.
This is nothing. This is funny incompetence.
Wait until unsmiling competence appears.
Or worse doesn’t and we all become Lagos.
The irony is that if you were irate, they would have had "reason" to suspect you.
I've had similar encounters in this Kafkaesque world and despite being a fiery person, I naturally remained calm and nothing escalated.
I honestly don't get why people look to intimidate police... Even with the stupid mask mandates on public transport, I would put my mask on and apologize only to let it uncover my nose later.
Don't give the authoritarian system a reason to arrest you!
Precisely.
I've had a few similar adventures, including being shaken down by police in East Berlin, and I was always calmly amused.
I get angry and excited over stupid shit that doesn't matter.